Why Talk Therapy Hasn’t Fixed Your Anxiety

Have you ever had a friend say “just stop worrying about it”? Did it work? Did you stop worrying? 

I didn't think so.

Logically you can understand worrying doesn’t fix anything, but knowing it is not enough to stop it.

This is why anxiety doesn’t get better with talk therapy alone - talking about it is not the same as doing something about it.

For some people therapy actually made their anxiety worse. And it breaks my heart when I hear this.

There’s a saying that comes up a lot in therapy, “It’ll get worse before it gets better”. This isn’t always true, but it can be, and here’s why..

In therapy you learn your triggers and the way you experience anxiety. You start to become hyper-aware of feeling uneasy, racing thoughts, and so on, every time it’s creeping up on you.

But you haven’t learned or used the tools to deal with it yet. 

Remember what I said before? Knowing it is not enough to stop it. 

Knowing and understanding is just the first step.

So what am I supposed to do then?

Coping skills. I know, I hate the term too. I try finding different ways to say it - coping strategies, tools, methods, exercises… 

Anyways, back to coping skills.

Why your coping skills aren’t working. 

“I’ve been using all the coping skills and it’s still not working!” Anxiety has become a pattern in your life, which means your tools for challenging anxiety need to become the new pattern.

Practicing deep breathing (or any other tool) only when you’re in a full blown panic is like throwing a water bottle at a bush fire. Good luck!

If you haven’t been practicing your coping strategies when your anxiety is a 3/10, how can you expect it to have any effect when your anxiety is a 10/10? It’s often Too Little Too Late.

Say you’ve been practicing all the strategies your therapist has taught you and it’s still not enough. 

It takes time and consistency. I know, super annoying.

I’m not always the most patient person either. If you’ve been dealing with anxiety for years, it’s going to take a little while for your new habits and practices to take hold.

For some people their symptoms are so severe and they need to get back to being able to function - go to work, care for their family, see their friends. The goal isn’t to suffer. When you’ve been practicing skills but not getting the results you want, this is when I bring up the conversation of medication.

The choice to take medication is a personal choice and every person has their own reasonings for why or why not. This is your choice and your choice alone.

The right medication can help take the edge off, but it’s generally not the cure. Some form of anxiety is still going to come through from time to time and you’ll still want the tools to be able to manage it when it does.

Ready to learn and use strategies to manage your anxiety?

Treating anxiety related disorders are my specialty. I have practiced each and every skill that I teach and share with others as a therapist who’s overcome anxiety.

Curious about working with me? Contact me today to schedule a free 15-minute consultation call.

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Disclaimer: The information on this blog is for educational and informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your qualified healthcare provider or mental health professional for any questions you may have regarding a condition.